Drowning

The pain, the urgency
mindless games playing my head
like a movie with no sound.
The twisting nature of a child
the unknowing consequences of the truth
the silenced tears, silenced emotions,
Like drowning in a sea of fear
where everything is a mess
NOTHING is clear.

Like a heartbeat that drives you mad
with every single beat
I’m gasping to breathe
struggling to find the energy
gripping on to anything I can find,
Listen carefully to the sound of my loneliness
is the silence as deafening to you as to me ?

Longing for the voice inside to be heard
but this time the screams are silenced by me
WHY ?
The truth lies beneath, buried like the dead
kept inside my my … my body
locked away … will it stay that way forever ?

Will I ever speak the truth ?
will that screaming voice inside be heard ?
To speak and be heard
to tell and be believed
For someone to help ease the hurt
someone to help me stop hurting myself.

Is there anyone that can hear what i’m not saying ?
is there anyone who can look beyond these shallow eyes of secrecy ?

Anyone ??