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Had a good day today

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    Had a good day today

    Wanted to note this. Itís been a tough road for a while. I am grateful for a good day. Thank you, SC leaders and all who post here, for your work, your support and encouragement.
    'We all want Canaan without going through the wilderness.'
    Ravi Zachariah ❤️

    #2
    Yay for a good day It is really important to notice them... and remember them when it gets hard again: these days do exist
    nane
    Raise your words not your voice, it's rain that grows flowers not thunder. ~Rumi


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      #3
      So glad today was a reprieve!
      Catie

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        #4
        Thanks Nane. You are right.

        My mind is on high alert always. I prayed with my husband today that God would give me peace and focus. It feels so good.

        I heard a quote today: will you go through the pain of discipline, or the pain of regret? It was in regards to high-level sports, but in looking it up I found several Scriptures talking about discipline that supported this question/quote. (See Scripture below). I thought about how I lack discipline in my thought life when it comes to trauma and healing. I have so much anger towards God. Where was He? I keep asking. I know now He was there. But the anger remains. My mind is ever-vigilant.

        I think my anger is hard to let go of in part because it is mine. I own it. My family owned me. They thought for me, told me what to do into my 50s. But they could not have my anger. In fact, anger helped me survive as a kid.

        But I maybe donít need it any more. I will have such regret if I donít push through this time of pain.

        I have no idea what life would be without anger. I am a slave to it.

        I asked the Lord to help me let go and help me trust Him a little bit today. The discipline of doing this was both exhausting and fulfilling.

        Here is a quote from Romans 6:16 "Do you not know that when you present yourselves to someone as slaves for obedience, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin resulting in death, or of obedience resulting in righteousness?"
        2 Timothy 1:7 (NIV) says that the Spirit does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.

        Iíve never thought of these verses in conjunction with my childhood abuse and letting go of anger. The Holy Spirit gives me power, love and self-discipline.....for freedom to fill my mind with Him, not rage?

        I have some processing to do. My memory is so bad these days. I hope I remember to do this!



        'We all want Canaan without going through the wilderness.'
        Ravi Zachariah ❤️

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          #5
          Thanks Catie!
          'We all want Canaan without going through the wilderness.'
          Ravi Zachariah ❤️

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            #6
            Intense emotions can be just exhausting. I imagine it's very hard work, processing the anger. I do hope little by little, you can come to feel more free of it.
            Catie

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              #7
              ((((((((hugs)))))))))) i hope good days come more frequently and crowd the hard ones out!

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