Domestic Violence

Symptoms of Abuse - Threats; Power Misuse; and Control

What symptoms below fit your life?

Using Emotional Abuse
  • Putting the other person down
  • Making the other person feel bad about themselves
  • Calling the other person names
  • Making the other person think they are crazy
  • Playing mind games
  • Humiliating the other person
  • Making the other person feel guilty

Using Privileges
  • Treating the other person like a servant
  • Making all the big decisions
  • Acting like the master of the castle
  • Being the one who determines the roles

Using Economic Abuse
  • Preventing the other person from getting or keeping a job
  • Making the other person ask for money
  • Giving the other person an allowance
  • Taking the other person's money
  • Not letting the other person know about or have access to family income

Using Coercion and Threats
  • Making or carrying out threats to do something to hurt the other person
  • Threatening to leave the other person, to commit suicide, report the other person to welfare
  • Making the other person drop charges
  • Making the other person do illegal things

Using Intimidation
  • Making the other person afraid by using looks, gestures, or actions
  • Smashing things
  • Abusing pets
  • Displaying weapons

Using Children
  • Making the other person feel guilty about the children
  • Using the children to relay messages
  • Using visitation to harass the other person
  • Threatening to take the children away

Using Isolation
  • Controlling what the other person does, who they see and talk to, what's read, and where they go
  • Limiting their outside involvement
  • Using jealousy to justify actions

Minimizing, Denying, Blaming
  • Making light of the abuse and not taking the other person's concerns about it seriously
  • Saying the abuse never happened
  • Shifting responsibility for abusive behavior
  • Saying the other person caused it


Does your partner:

Blame everyone else especially you, for his or her mistakes?
Yes___ No___

Prevent you from seeing your family or friends?
Yes___ No___

Curse you, say mean things, mock you or humiliate you?
Yes___ No___

Force you to have sex or force you to engage in sex that makes you feel uncomfortable?
Yes___ No___

Restrain, hit, punch, slap, or kick you?
Yes___ No___

Intimidate or threaten you?
Yes___ No___

Ever prevent you from leaving the house, getting a job, or continuing your education?
Yes___ No___

If you answered "yes" to any of these questions, you may be in an abusive relationship.